Jinkmeister

That painful-sounding kick!

I think twice during the entire downtime

"Hello, is this tech support? I have a problem"

Chapter II“YOUR WORKOUT WILL BE IN COMMON AREA 12 AT PRECISELY 0700!” the speaker shouted, much too loud and tinny. The Ta-Utopian rubbed his ear as he stood, raising himself to his full six foot height. All Utopians, being bio-mechanical, were a uniform six feet tall. That way, all buildings could be uniform, and nothing and nobody would need to be special or considered special. The Ta-Utopian clasped his hands behind his head as he stretched. Another long day on Utopia had begun for Mr. Sel Worth.“So Mr. Worth, what took you so long?” The Peacekeeper standing sentinel outside of the mess hall was always known to be rather easy-going on late risers, but everyone had their off days, and today was one of those.“I had...dreams. Nothing too serious, I should be fine,” Sel replied as he attempted to step into the building. He knew the arm would block the door before it even went up.“Dreams, huh? Anything that we Peacekeepers need to be worried about? They say dissidents can get inside your head these days.” Today, this particular Peacekeeper felt like making someone's day bad, and he was already off to a good start.“If I had dissidents sending messages into my dreams, I'd know,” Sel growled. The Peacekeeper smirked, his arm still barring the door.“You know you need to go see the Dream Recorder, right? Forget morning meal, national security is better than your full stomach,” the Peacekeeper said in a disturbingly pleased voice. Sel opened his mouth to respond, thought better, and shut it. The Peacekeeper lowered his arm and crossed both across his chest, grinning wickedly. Sel stared him in the eye before turning and walking away.“And make sure they probe DEEP!” Such parting words infuriated Sel, but he knew better than to respond. Shortly, he arrived at a door bearing a sign that read:DR. MAZINGDREAM AND THOUGHT ANALYSTTaking a deep breath, Sel opened the door and stepped in.“Welcome Mr. Worth! Please take a seat, the Doctor will be right with you!” The Ga-Utopian secretary was far too bubbly and energetic, as all secretaries in Utopia are. Sel sat down in a plush chair in a small, bright room full of chairs, hand sanitizer, and the latest copies of “The Utopian Times” and “You, Yourself, and Utopia”, the only authorized Utopian magazines. After ten minutes of fiddling with his fingers, Sel picked up a nearby copy of “The Utopian Times”. Flipping to a random page, he saw an article titled “Your Child and Their Education.” Directly below it was an image of a class of Utopian children, all standing and smiling the exact same way.“As if...” Sel mumbled, causing the secretary to glance up. Sel remembered clearly his time in the School. He was glad to be out, and he felt terrible for the children in the image. Having to go through “Class”, and then to have to pose for this image. Pretending as if the horrors they were undergoing was the greatest thing they've experienced in their young lives. Behind every smile was a child who was so beaten, so decimated that they barely resembled Utopians. Closer to Corrected than anything. Then Sel noticed the eyes. All the eyes had a look of pain, a plea disguised by a fake smile. Their eyes bored into his mind, begging him to set them free...Sel closed the magazine and threw it to the table. At this, the secretary looked up.“The Doctor will see you now!” She bubbled. Sel got up and stepped through a door that opened next to the secretary. She gave a friendly wave as he walked by, and returned to her work. Likely some card game or another, Sel thought resentfully as he walked down the hallway. There was only one door at the end, the walls leading to it plastered with diplomas and awards for this or that accomplishment that the Doctor may or may not have done. Sel grabbed for the handle, but the door was already opening.“Mr. Worth, glad you could make it!” The Doctor was an Onu-Utopian, and a former Peacekeeper. He had been a Doctor of Dreams and Thought for as long as anyone could remember. He could decipher the most cryptic thought or explain the most twisted dream. It was through him that a large majority of thought crimes were brought to light. “Please take a seat, Mr. Worth!” He said, indicating the plush chairs in front of him.“Thank you Doctor,” Sel said as he sat down on the rightmost chair. It was far too comfortable, giving the feeling that you were in front of a good friend. Sel knew better.“So, it's come to my attention that you've been having dreams?” The Doctor said, clasping his hands on his desk.“Yes Doctor...” Sel replied, preparing his mind. The Doctor grinned, prepared to dissect every single word Sel said from that point on. Sel knew this, and Sel feared it greatly. He hated any other person knowing his mind, and this was an agent of his greatest enemy.

Yes. Yes I am the only one with a problem.

Daring Do? Daring do what? A backflip?

3/5

Review my story The Utopian here! Thanks all!

Chapter 1Unique. Different. Special. Gifted. None were words used in The Utopia. Everyone was equal, everyone shared the work. If you were particularly gifted at a skill, you were forbidden to practice it. The Po-Utopian who was skilled at whittling stone into works of art was made to work at the Great Waterworks. Meanwhile, the Ga-Utopian learned in the art of chemistry was sent to whittle the stones into crude forms of art. In this way, no Utopian was better than another. They were all equally unskilled at their given trade. Given was the only word. Not chosen, nor inherited. It was assigned, but by who, no one knew. All job assignments were passed out by a different Peacekeeper bi-annually. If a Utopian was found to begin learning their given trade too well, they were sent to do another. In this way, all Utopians were equal. The Onu-Utopian was just as bad at hydroponics as the Ta-Utopian was at gardening.Over all of this watched the Grand Utopian Empire and their many Peacekeepers. Behind closed doors, small cells of dissidents pinned the number of Peacekeepers to being nearly equal to those of an average Utopian. Of course, no Utopian was above average, nor were they even technically average. They were all equally below-average. All Utopians Equal, All Utopians Together. The phrase every young Utopian learned in Utopian Allegiance School, where all Utopians spent the first fourteen years of their life, disconnected from all but the School and the Empire.All Utopians Equal, All Utopians Together. If you couldn't say that without so much as thinking, a death penalty was almost assured. Lack of patriotism was almost as bad as treachery in the eyes of the Empire. Of course, death was the Empire's form of a merciful punishment. No one knew what happened to those found guilty of treachery, but those that stepped out of the Correctional Facility were never the same. They would walk around with eyes glazed over, occasionally mumbling the phrase 'All Utopians Equal, All Utopians Together' over and over. They worked like robots, and could never speak in complete sentences. Yet, they never had a mark on their body. Seeing these Corrected, as they were called, was sufficient to make traitors think twice.Of course, there was happiness in Utopia. Sometimes they would have sporting events at the Arena, where Corrected would be pitted against vicious animals and even other Corrected. It was always quite entertaining, watching one Corrected gouge another Corrected's eyes out. Of course, the winner is put down on the field, since it would be far too dangerous to introduce it into the Utopian population again. None felt remorse for them, since they were the only beings considered Sub-Utopian. Even the animals were valued above them.But of the typical Utopian, their day consisted of their morning meal, a workout in the Common Areas, then off to work. There, you worked for six hours before taking your noon meal, and then returning to work for another six to eight hours. You then returned home, where you were free to do whatever you pleased, so long as you obeyed the lengthy Book of Home, Work, Play, And Thought Laws. It was through that book that many Utopians had been sentenced guilty of treachery. Oddly enough, all trials ended one of two ways: treachery or lack of patriotism. No one who went to court ever walked out free. Therefore, Utopians did all they could to obey the Book of Laws, as it was called for short. For instance-BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP“Ugh...” The Utopian sat up in bed, rubbing his eyes. His dreams had been fitful, and he didn't feel like telling them to the Dream Recorder. But of course, he must. Once in a while, he would lie and say he didn't dream, but he only dared to say it when he couldn't remember most of the dream. He had no idea how they could, but he was sure they knew if he lied. Lying, of course, was considered treachery. It kind of made sense, since-BEEP BEEP...click...THOOMThe tube lights on his ceiling boomed as they turned on, and began buzzing incessantly once they had come on.“UTOPIAN 4891, GET UP!” the speaker across the room blared.“I'm up, I'm up...” the Ta-Utopian muttered, rubbing his eyes again. He hadn't meant to fall back to sleep. Looking up at the clock, he groaned. He was late for morning meal. He would have to give an excuse, and he just knew he would end up seeing the Dream Recorder because of it.-----Review here please!

Chapter IVHello and Lerahk screamed as they plummeted again, the former in fear (Another new emotion), and the latter in glee. Lewa laughed also, though it was muffled, seeing as Hello had his arms and legs wrapped around Lewa's head in fright.“Hold on tight!” Lewa shouted, still muffled, as he whipped out his air katana. Almost immediately they braked, Hello nearly wrenching Lewa's head off. Lewa screamed in pain, and twisted in the air, throwing Lerahk and Hello off.“NOT AGAIIIIIIINNNN!” Hello screamed as they fell. Their fall was ended abruptly by an innocent Le-Matoran.“It is raining men! This is a message from God! Repent, all ye faithful!” He shouted, seemingly oblivious of the two creatures crushing him.“What's God?” Asked Lerahk.“I don't know, I just felt like we needed a break from the Great Pokemen.” Before he finished his sentence, a posse of copyright lawyers promptly ran into the forest.“Sir, you'll have to come with us for questioning,” they explained as they grabbed the Le-Matoran and walked out. One opened a briefcase and showed the Matoran a piece of paper as they dragged him.“I meant Great Beingsssssss!” The Le-Matoran screamed as he was dragged away.“So, Lerahk,” said Hello as he got up, forgetting about the interesting events. “What should we do?”“Why don't we take that cart over there and be traveling salesmen?” Suggested Lerahk, pointing at the Le-Matoran's abandoned cart.“But isn't that stealing?” Asked Hello.“But it belonged to that green midget!”“How do you know that?”“I don't, I am simply trying to justify our necessity for a plot device to catapult us into a situation that will require us to live up to this comedy's title.”“Did you just break the fourth wall AND say something intelligent in the same breath?” Hello gawked, now experiencing shock. Who knew there were so many emotions?“No.”“Good, because I-”“I did it in two.” Lerahk said, grinning stupidly, once again in character. Hello held his forehead in his hand for a moment. He then turned around and examined the cart.“While we're breaking the fourth wall, I wonder how different this comedy would be if it were in script form. I think, for one thing, there would have to be much more dialogue, right?”“Hehehe, bubbles.” Lerahk said. Hello just sighed, and turned back to the cart.“There seems to be a combination lock...”“Why would someone use two locks?”“Lerahk, why don't you just go over to that tree and talk to it about fast food or dolls or something.”“Okay!” Lerahk happily skipped over. Hello turned once again to his work.“Hmm, maybe if I melt the locks...” He pointed one of his shields at it, and tried to fire a small blast of fire, but only a couple sparks flew out.“Forgot, don't have my Krana...hmm...I know!” Hello proceeded to look up to the heavens, “Please open this cart, author!” Almost immediately, Lewa fell from the sky and landed right on the cart, somehow unlocking the lock. He then proceed to get up, wave merrily, and fly off.“Uh...right, thanks.” Said Hello. He then proceeded to open up the cart. Inside it were all sorts of little trinkets. “Geez, he must have been one heck of a collector...” He thought to himself as he went through all the stuff, discarding a can of green paint.Meanwhile, at a prison...“I swear, I meant Great Beings!” Ahkmou pleaded, green paint chipping off his armor. The guards simply ignored him, and went back to their heated, incredibly suspenseful game of Four Squared.Back in Le-Koro...“And THEN it taught me about all the employee benefits from working at McDonalds versus Burger King!” Lerahk said proudly.“Well, the way I see it,” Hello said, completely ignoring Lerahk, “We could parade around Mata Nui selling all this stuff, and we'll make a %100 profit, unless those pesky zoning laws come into effect, but then again, it would be considered a mobile endavour...”“So we're gonna sell stuff!” Lerahk said, obviously excited.“Yeah, Lerahk, we're gonna sell stuff. I wonder why this guy had all this stuff, anyway...Back in the prison...“I really hope no one steals my cart. I stole all that stuff first, fair and square!” Ahkmou mourned as he watched the guards fight over who would get to use the blue pieces.

Quite.I dunno what a Gespenst Kick is, but it sounds painful.

The least canon line in all of Metal Gear Solid, since Snake never dies! 8DAnd is that...Gundam?

The Best Kept Secrets are...credited to Shattered Mask Productions?

What is this I don't even

Pinkie Pie!

Just give him a heart attack!

That's Samus. And she's a chick. Best part is, I've never played either of their games :3

Alrighty, how do y'all like this?

There. We're live!

Chapter 1 is out now!

Just wait till the matching banner is up!

There's that dang hotline guy again!And any better?

My first act was terrible comedies...now they're only slightly less terrible!

And now you know how paralyzed people feel!